So, Jack and I have been solo since 5pm yesterday. Taylor is in North Carolina for work. This is the first time she has been away from Jack for more than a few hours. I am sure part of her is not doing so well.
But, this was my opportunity to prove that I can handle Jack by myself. I was never so paranoid in all my life. What if I don't hear him cry? What if he goes into a fit while I am in the shower? What if I can't get him to go to sleep? What if? What if? What if??
But, it was a normal night. We ate and played and went to bed. It took him a little longer than usual to go to sleep (45 minutes), partly due to shorter naps at daycare and also because I am not the normal person to put him to bed. My body temperature is high, like his, so he gets sweaty quickly and has trouble getting comfortable. But, he went to bed and didn't wake up until 5:45 this morning. The drive to daycare was okay too, but getting to work after dropping him off took forever.
There were two moments in the last 24 hours that broke my heart:
* Normally, when we get home, Jack and I play for a few minutes, then change into his sleep outfit, then play until Taylor gets home. Then, he eats and we hang out a little longer before bedtime. Last night, Jack kept looking at me around the time Taylor walks in the door. He looked at me then towards the front door. A few minutes later, he did this again. Each time he lifted his head up to look at me and his big eyes looked like he wanted to say "where is mommy?"
* This morning, when I dropped Jack off at daycare, I kissed him and handed him off to one of the teachers and chatted for a moment. I have never dropped Jack off at daycare before and as I walked to the door, he stared back at me with the same eyes, but this time they said "where are you going? Daddy picks me up, why are you leaving?"
So, not only was traffic horrible this morning, I had his sad little face to haunt me the entire drive. Sigh, hopefully neither of us has to leave him very often.
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